Here's some (apparently) genuine, and very odd, product labels sent to me this morning:
On a Morphy Richards hairdryer -- "Do not use while sleeping"
On a bag of Fritos -- "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."
On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."
On some Birds Eye frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use." - what's that then???
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." - did this really happen?