Aint it great to be British?
 

CLASSIC VERSION:

An ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

THE END





THE BR!ITISH VERSION:
An ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like him, are cold and starving.

The BBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper, with cuts to a video of the ant in his comfortable warm home in Hampstead with a table laden with food.

The British are stunned that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so while others have plenty.

The Liberal Party, the Respect Party, the Transvestites with Starving Babies Party and the Coalition against Poverty demonstrate in front of the ant's house. The BBC, interrupting a Rastafarian cultural festival special from Grimsby with breaking news, broadcasts them singing "We Shall Overcome."

Ken Livingstone laments in an interview with Panorama that the ant has got rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share."

In response, the Labour Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti-Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The ant's taxes are reassessed, and he is also fined for failing to hire grasshoppers as helpers. Without enough money to pay the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by Camden Council.

The ant moves to France, and starts a successful agribiz company [funded by the Britain via the EU.

The BBC later shows the now fat grasshopper finishing up the last of the ant's food, though
Spring is still months away, while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he hasn't bothered to maintain it.

Inadequate government funding is blamed; Diane Abbot is appointed to head a commission of enquiry that will cost £10m.

The grasshopper is soon dead of a drug overdose; the Guardian blames it on the obvious failure of government to address the root causes of despair arising from social inequity.

The abandoned house is taken over by a gang of immigrant spiders, praised by the government for enriching Britain's multicultural diversity, who promptly set up a marijuana growing operations and terrorise the community.

THE END

I think that story is easily translated to work in whatever country you reside. We have those same issues in the US.

Most reasonably intelligent adults realise that not everyone in this world receives the education, opportunities or loving family that they are entitled to and therefore are disadvantaged from the offset of childhood. What chance do we think a kid in an inner city sink estate has, surrounded as they are by neglect and destruction of their environment and education by those in power.

Kids who leave school unable to read or write and in many cases unable to make value judgements on what is right or wrong and the ramifications which can follow from inappropriate decisions and behaviour, mainly due to a weak and spineless government and educational system.

Some groups of people will still get together and try to make a difference and stand up for equal rights for all, be they lesbian ,gay, black, immigrants or the uneducated or people lacking simple opportunities to improve their lives.

Yes they do need help and funding and we who are able to should support them, after all we are one of the richest economies in the world.

Instead of criticising the criminal and disadvantaged in our communities we should take time out to reflect on the opportunities which we have been given and think about what we as citizens can do for our fellow human beings to improve society as a whole.

Save your criticism for a free loading prime minister who has taken us into an illegal war costing the lives of tens of thousands of innocent people. Probably more than the previous dictator managed in his lifetime. And what an example our current home secretary is setting to others at the moment. '' I've set 1000 dangerous prisoners out into society who should have been deported and I will not resign no matter what crimes have been commited by them since''

Have we yet heard the word ''Sorry''?

What an example to set to the people he is supposed to protect.

Phil

Hmm. I think we were meant to read the Ant Story with a certain amount of tongue-in-cheek.

There is a certain ring of truth in it though.

Eg: I was brought up in a run-down area of North London. I hated it and worked my ar*se off, did my homework and got an apprenticeship. My school mates thought I was nuts working for such low pay and having to go to night school.

I’m now director of a company and, whilst not rich, I have no money worries, but I’m up every night worrying about my business and my staff.

I have a brother. He was brought up in the same house, same parents and at the same school.

He’s currently in prison for theft.
He’s a drug addict.
He doesn’t work and has always been on the dole.
He has a nice flat (provided by the council).
He has a car but never has tax, insurance or MOT’s.

I work 50-60 hours a week, my brother thinks I’m an idiot working at all.

If I need help from the authorities they won’t give it until my savings are used up and I’ve sold my house. If my brother needs anything he asks and “The Social” gives it to him.

Who’s the ant and who’s the grasshopper?
:mad:

My own situation also reflects Martini's.
If any one else would like to ease their own guilty conscience, caused by life's 'unfairness' they are welcome to come and pay my f$*king taxes, I know that I'm keeping a family afloat on what I pay each month.
And as for the Iraq scenario, when were you last there, me Op Telic and Op Telic 4. 12 months of my life for these innocents, 24 months of my life for Kosovo and Bosnia and 12 months for the NI solution + other minor holidays abroad. I can tell you all about supposedly being innocent.
Ck's text was meant to be a light hearted reflection on an all too familiar story that seems to be affecting everyday people's lives. If none of what is written has ever affected you, then you are truly in an envious position.
I know that I and many other 'civil servants' are sick of this country, it's 'leaders' and the direction they are taking us in.
PS ref the 'poor' children that can't read or write, my partner is a teacher and has been for 10 years in this country and abroad, take a visit to a local comprehensive and see for yourself what is happening in our schools, before commenting.

it was indeed:(

I'll stick up for you girl! :D

It would be great to be British if we could freely express our concerns for our nation without being accused of racism.

I don't agree with a lot that the BNP stand against but they do have some good national values.

Might be the wrong place to mention it but then again it might not.

wow philthy for prime minister i say!!



I BLAME ALL THE PEOPLE WHO VOTE FOR THEM!!!!!

DONT VOTE !!!


ATALL ---EVER!!!:flame::flame:

Good funny parable CK,
I enjoyed for one


WRT the rest of the thread, there's a time and a place.

and in France.

The BBC in describing the Home Secretary's approach to the current debacle sums it up:

"Mr Clarke himself, meanwhile, appears to have adopted a version of the self-flagellation strategy, touring every media outlet and making a full Commons statement admitting the mistake, putting his hands up and insisting it is his duty to stay and sort it out. It is a tried and tested strategy which may or may not have the desired effect. "

Where ever people screw up there seems to be this idea that you can put your hand up, pretend to take the blame, and it'll all be forgotten by the morning. What's happened to the tried and tested strategy of you screw up you resign?

I want out of this country and go and live it Italy.

CK

Please don't take my comments personally. I enjoyed the story but it got me thinking.

I've got quite ( o.k. then ..very ) strong right wing leanings, but all they do is raise my blood pressure because I am well aware that I am powerless to change anything.

I am therefore trying to see the other side of each equation and hope that I will live longer as a result.( Unless I'm murdered by a grasshopper )

Raykay

My kids go to a local comprehensive and a friend of mine was a teacher so I am well aware of what goes on in schools. What I was trying to say was that the kids who are disruptive need to be treated differently to the kids who just want to get on and learn. If we can educate the disruptive kids to behave and become useful members of society then it will make life better for all of us.

Drug use and criminal behaviour costs the country billions of pounds a year , not to mention the human cost in destroyed lives of victims and wasted lives of the perpetrators. I strongly believe that we should lock up violent or persistent offenders but while they are locked up we should make every effort to change their behaviour and turn them into useful citizens.

As Henners says, politicians preach to us about how we should live our lives and then go and do the opposite and then expect us to look up to them.

Phil

CK - You seem to have touched a nerve! Sorry if my rant upset some people.

rcgbob44 - I agree with you. Spent a lot of time in Italy (Bologna) and loved it. They seem to have the work/life balance just right. Terrible beer, though :)

Wanting to move to Canada for exactly the same reasons. (good beer as well..)


ant (sic)

[Edited on 27-4-2006 by Chief R.B.]

And Hockey!!!!!:D:D:D

As you said they should be treated differently, not preferentially as they are now. There is no longer any deterent for misbehaviour in schools, as the schools them selves are constantly haranged by the newest social experimentationalists. Why therefore should the good kids in school strive so hard to achieve when all around them, in school and out, the latest Jade Goody or Michael Carroll is receiving more attention, money and respect than they ever will with their 9-5 mon-fri jobs.

I dont really know when the rot truely started to set in but I would say when with the backing of the Teachers unions to ban capitial punishment (I had the cane once and never bothered to try and have it again,its called DISCIPLINE) and the idea that intergration of uncontrolable children who dont want to learn in classes of pupils who do is a national disaster.
when I was at school everyone was given an equal chance to learn but if you where determined to disrupt classes you where put in a special class you still got a basic education but you could not stop the rest of the pupils from making progress.
I know this wont go down well but when teachers start moaning about lack of discipline and respect from pupils I have only to say it was self inflicted
I respected my teachers because of the way they were Firm/Honest generaly fair and passionate about their subjects
what i remember most was the fact that they wanted to impart learning they werent concerned whether there was 10 bright pupils or 50 as long as they passed on the basic skills to get on in life.
now all teachers are concerned about is there position in the school exam league tables,instead of learning a broad spectrum of a subject the kids are fed parrot fashion on focused areas so that they walk in to the exam an work like preprogrammed robots.
and my final gripe about respect is when dress like kids you are like kids and the teacher pupil divide is gone and I shouldnt think it will be long before there all wearing hoodies.

its like all liberal/labour scocial engineering its all a case of dumbing down if you take away decent education so people have low expectations there easier to brain wash.
look at labours voters there made up of unmarried mothers immigrants and the work shy all because these are the ones most protected by labour.:flame::flame::flame:

.....and all this knowledge is based on.....???????

When was the last time you went into school and sat in class????:)

Hi Kwikbitch and your profession please
no prizes then
My experience is following my daughters progression through the system and going to 99% of all parent evenings having teachers as friends and debating said arguments and my wife having been a caretaker of a school for 6 years and dealing with both teachers and pupils.
please tell me if education is not being dumb'd down why science is now merged into one lump when clearly if you need doctors/vets etc they need basic grounding in specific sciences not some overview that falls short of the knowledge they need to take A level sciences.
and one wonders why there is such a huge drop out rate in the sciences and that most sucsseful pupils come from the private sector.
ian

teachers...tough job, made harder by a control freak govt

some are good

some are bad

like all walks of life

question really is why should someone who has nothing and not tried have the same has someone who has nothing but did their best...for me the state should support those who give/have given it THIER best shot and are willing to contribute in some way :)

kwikbitch
one classic example of why I have lost all understanding of the profession.
Just before my daughters GCSE's like all teenagers she could'nt be arsessed sometimes to revise and at a parents meeting I said to her geography teacher that I thought she was under achieving, the teacher then turned to my daughter and asked what she was going to do after her exams she reply'd that she wanted to go to her local sixth form to do A level Geography.
and this is were I fell through the floor she said to my daughter thats OK all you need is a C to get into there bearing in mind that she was boardering on an A pass if she put her mind to it.
after that she really relaxed and got a D thats what I call a real incentive to better yourself.

Greetings from Spain
 

Lisa - you´re the best teacher I have ever met :)

CK - you´re the fairest person I´ve ever met :)

... off to the beach,

Hxx

PEACE... don't drink espresso in the morning if you are not Italians/or used to!!! :lol::lol::lol::lol:

..going riding ..now... as is sunny in Berkshire!!!!!:sing::sing: