Part 2 of the KB and Mort story
 

Sad person that I am, I miss following the trials and tribulations blah dee blah so here's part 2

KBs bike is smaller than mine and got less quality
Slippers is wot real bikers talk about, should I have one or not and wot are the advantages/disadvantages, not pink fluffy things
Blooo is the real colour for SS's
Belly Pan is what goes bolts under the engine and not wot u rest on your stomach after a night on drambuie shandies
Over to you Lisa
Lurve you really!!!
rgds
mort
:roll::roll:

ps note I put you first this time, just for equality's sake, didnt want you moaning it was a male oriented thing (or maybe did):lol:

I cant even be bothered to discuss slippers and BHP with you if you cant even be bothered to turn up to Nelly's on your bike!!! What's up? Arthritis playing up?
Call me a girlie...Pah! no good showing off with your slicks and spare swing arm if they are displayed in the boot of your Jag!
(crosses arms with nose in the air and throws dirty look!)
AND YOUR COFFEE IS CRAP!

:P:P:P
PS Thanx for the hug when I was cold!;)

the bitching continues:P

So Mort gets a roasting for turning up in the Jag!
Be careful Lisa or I'll tell everyone what you were seen getting out of at Sutton Parkway :lol::lol::lol:

Hey! iIm not ashamed to say I was seen getting out of a police car at Sutton Parkway...Thing is Mr Rushjob... You dropped me off without hand cuffs.
:o
AND you whizzed off pretty sharpish:P

I want to know what lisa woz doing getting out of a bacon m`bile???????????

is KB/lisa.............bacon ot worst still a warden!!!:(

:D

A gentleman never tells tales at any price.
Buy me a bag of chips & I'll tell all!:lol:

OY! I thought you were meant to be cutting back...!;)
Bob...Make it a packet of snack a jacks or walkers lites and he'll tell all!;):P

An interesting offer lisa!
I would love to know how many people on here are police employee`s:o

Have a nice day!

Ooooh! get Yoooooo!:lol::lol::lol:

OMG
 

hijacked by the fuzz
KB, you told me handcuffs were a play thing!!
Gettin out of fuzz cars needs a careful approach, cover head wiff a bag or newspaper.........be seen not to be seen......if seen, then you gotta be a celeb.........
Well, I guess you failed on all counts.:P:P
Ok so I turn up wiff sticky tyres in boot, Ive got sticky tyre, not those wiff 3 inches either side that arent used
Tyres is for bends, not straight lines
Cadwell is a race track, not a CBT learner centre
Mallory is great for Gerrards, Gerrard is not a poof hairdresser you know for puttin more red in the hair:devil:
We dont suffer from PMT
and again SLIPPERS is wot make changing down wiffout locking up the rear wheel easier, and they is RED from STM
so there !:D:D:D:D
btw Andy, did she "beg a ride" just to be seen in a shiny car wiff bloooo (its the only colour, now) lights on it
mort:roll::roll:

so the saga continues
 

I woz on the bike Saturday KB, where were you?
My shiny blooo thingy vs the matt matrix likkle thingy, all tucked up neatly at Nelly's..
just coz there were a likkle snow on the ground never stopped us hardy riders you know!
Matrix woz last year
Lord of the blooo rings is this year
a few stickers dont mean you is fast
slippers aint pink
Cadwell is not fer likkle girlies
Mallory is a race track, not a shade of lipstick
Camping is staying overnight in a tent, not wot you do wiff your right hand (well maybe I should rephrase that one!!!)
Trailer is for moving race bikes, not wot you go to the flicks (are they stilled called that??) for.
Bonding is wot you do to a broke fairing, not wot namby pamby teachers do in a group hug
Oh how I lurve this
unfortunately a sober (not fer long) mort
bestest
mort:roll::roll:

You was on quit a roll there Mort, stopped in your prime,you're not on Detox are you .Get back hear KB, smartish Nothing like wacking a man when he's down:lol: 4D

"Camping is staying overnight in a tent, not wot you do wiff your right hand (well maybe I should rephrase that one!!!) "
Oh! dear Mort!...Things getting that bad at home?
OK! Hers some tips for you...

LOVEMAKING TIPS FOR OLDER PERSONS



- Put bifocals on. Double check that you're with the right partner.

- Set alarm on your clock for 2 minutes... in case you doze off in the middle.

- Set the mood with lighting. Turn 'em ALL OFF !

- Make sure you put 999 on your speed dial before you begin... just in case!

- Write partner's name on your hand in case you can't remember what to scream out at the end.


:lol::lol::P:P

[Edited on 1-3-2004 by kwikbitch]

4D
 

She's still trying to think up an (any) answer, but may take awhile. You know women brain speed, about an 8086 vs our pentiums!!!!
Detox is wot I do each night when I get home
Too much blood in alchohol stream, so have to replace it wiff some 13% sauvignon blanc.
Its starting to werk, just about now.........:lol::lol:
Oh how i just lurve this part, another quick gulp of the wine and will be ready in all pride and glory.......if u get the drift?
rgds
a second glas down neck, and anuvver bokkle at least to go
ps woz it fergin cold out on the bike last weekend, but KB wouldnt know. Hers woz all wrapped in pink fluffy blankets at Nelly's, just coz it woz a likkle damp and white outside
.............
mort:roll::roll:

ACTUALLY! you'll find I picked it up just after you left...Coz being as old as you, you cant stay out in the cold too long in case the arthritis plays up...
By the way...did Nelly tell you that he's doing a special on grab rails attached to the frame to help OAPs onto their bikes...
He's also looking at zimmer attachments and stabilizers!
:P

errrrrrrr................you can leave me out of this little side show, if you please :P:saint:

Oy..I say KB
 

bit below the belt with arthritis aint it

Just coz I got to manually bend me knees to get me leg over!! the bike, that is

I seem to remember sex, its wot I did 20 yrs ago

Camping, is wot gays do, hence limp wristed right hand, but I guessed that that one went right over pretty likkle (red) head:o
I told u b4 that zimmer is a mountain in......oh deja vu
P...y strips is what you got on the side of your tyres, not wot you need a gillette mk 3 for:D:D:D
Why turn the lights off if youve got two paper bags, I ask meself?.........
One fer her head and one fer mine, just in case hers breaks........
Why set the alarm fer two mins, I ask meself?........
when we need as long as we need
and finally I have a tattoo on my member (so to speak)
One young lady once asked "Why does it say Miss on your d..k"
I answered, "Thats not Miss
.
.
.
.
.
.its Mississippi
so there
:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
Let the battle really commence
still, Lurve you to bits,
Bloooo mort (its this years black):roll::roll:

Sorreee! :D

Mort you know what...
Not all men are annoying. Like you.. some are nearly dead.
You are running out of one liners...
Did you stop to think, and forget to start again? Must be your age!;)
AND us young un's do have our uses..Make sure you are nice to your daughter. She'll choose your nursing home.
Ive had enuff now...so Don't pee me off! I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.
And you know what? The cellar work has just been completed and people keep asking me where the hubby is!:P:P:P
:devil::devil::devil:
Lurve youz Mort!
Lx

SEX?????????????

I did it once, messy affair, wouldn`t want to do that again!:o