Letter to Agony Aunt, poor bloke
 

Dear Abby,
> >
> >I've never written to you before, but I really need your
> >
> >advice on what could be a crucial decision. I've suspected for some
> >
> >time now that my wife has been cheating on me.
> >
> >The usual signs... phone rings but if I answer, the caller
> >
> >hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently
> >
> >although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends
> >
> >from work, you don't know them."
> >
> >
> >I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but
> >
> >she always walks down the drive.
> >
> >Although I can hear a car driving off, as if she has just got out of
> >
> >the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she wasn't in a taxi? I once
> >
> >picked her mobile phone up just to see what time it was and she went
> >
> >berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and
> >
> >why was I checking up on her.
> >
> >
> >Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I
> >
> >think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night
> >
> >she went out again and I decided to really check on her.
> >
> >I decided I was going to park my Ducati motorcycle next to the garage
> >
> >and then hide behind it so that I could get a good view of the whole
> >street when she came home. It was at that moment, crouching behind
> >
> >my Ducati, that I noticed that the valve covers on my engine seemed
> >
> >to be leaking a little oil.
> >
> >Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to
> >
> >the dealer?
> >
> >Thanks,

3rd time on the board :D