Ducati Sporting Club UK > General > Idle Chat > Most embarrasing moment

[Return of the BDG]

After Rattlers key episode i wondered what was most peoples worst story?

MINE IS AS FOLLOWS

Back in the mid 80's i was living in a flat above the office. A few of us had been out for a big party and went back to the flat to crash out.

We all went to bed very late and very drunk. Mick got up in middle of night to go to the loo, the door was closed so he decided to go downstairs into the office and use downstairs loo. However this set off the alarm in the office with master blaster/air raid siren next to my bedroom window.

When internal alarm went off Mick did not get me to turn alarm off, he just ripped the internal siren of the wall above the toilet door.

Bad move as when the wires were broken the alarm thinks its being tampered with and will not turn off.

I leap out of bed with 200 decibel siren going off by my window, try an turn alarm off to no avail. At this point drunk number 3 whom is also sleeping over, joins us.

We all go outside, get ladders, climb up and snip wire to the air raid siren to shut it up.

This reduces noise to 130 decibels and only the alarm box is going off.

We move ladders to alarm box, climb up, pull wires out of wall and cut. Silence for about 1 second then internal battery takes over and alarm box continues making lots of noise.

Next move is get crowbar from workshop, prise alarm box of wall. it falls to ground but still keeps going off. Resort to extreme violence and smash alarm box to pieces with crowbar to be rewarded with silence for a few seconds before we hear the sound of another siren.

This time it's the police siren as the car screams into the yard with lights on full beam to illuminate Mick in his undies, Quent with a towel wrapped round him and me completely naked with crowbar in hand!

We manage to convince the police that we are not drunken naked, pervert burglars but the alarm company are not quite as understanding when i report a slight fault with the office alarm!

Whats your most embarrasing situation that you will confess to?

[ScottyB]

Picture the scene...........

Nervous as hell meeting the wife to be's relatives for the first time over from Hong Kong. Gran, Great Gran the whole tribe.

We were sat down to celebrate Chinese New Year with the traditional drinking of chinese teas on our knees round a small table.

I had been practising how to say "Happy New Year" in Chinese for days wanting to impress them........

What i actually said was "Happy Fanny"

I thought her Grandparents were going to have heart attacks right there in front of me..........

There was chinese tea being spat from mouths in amazement, people swallowing it the wrong way allsorts.........

Did i take the hint......

No i said it again about 3 times trying to get my pronounciaition spot on until the missus gave me the look all men recognise "Shut the F Up"

It wasn't until later she told me what i had said.............

Embarrasing????Hell yeah!!!!!

[Dukerob]

we got back to my mates house after a night out which had included an hallucinagenic substance along with much beer, a few funny fags and a curry only to find we'd lost the house keys, so we climbed onto the wheelie bin, and very carefully took the glass out of the small kitchen window then he climbed in through it, landing in the sink full of water and mucky pots etc, he managed to scamble out and get through to the front door to open it and let everyone else in, stuck his hand in his pocket and......... pulled out the front door key !!!

[JACKO748S]

Mine happened over in Belfast. I was serving over there on a very small detachment of 3 blokes. Anyway, on those sorts of jobs the days just seem to roll into each other and you kind of lose track of things.

Myself and another fella headed into the city for our usual meal and a few pints of the black stuff. Anyway, we chose our restaurant (not dissimilar to a hard rock cafe type place). For some reason it seemed extraordinarily busy for a week day. We took our table and ordered without batting an eyelid.

Then my mate taps my leg under the table - "Have you noticed anything strange" he says. "No" says I. " Look above us mate" he says.

I look up and there is the biggest balloon shaped like a love heart you have ever seen! Yep, it was Valentines day..........

Needless to say my burger didn't touch the sides and we passed on the dessert.

[paulmort]

In the forces at Christmas we used to make bars (of the beer drinking kind) and then the best was judged bt the CO Commanding Officer of the base.
So at Episkopi on the last of the christmas days, the CO does his competition inspection and judges that the Spanish Galleon bar woz best,
so orft we all jolly well heads and downs gallons of Keo beer on gallons of local brandy, (you have to remember that all barrack blocks are built in a similar style btw)
so after many of all the drinky type things, imagine my disgust at findin that summwun is in my bed, by this time its 4 am and Im slightly p155ed
so after a five minute struggle, I kick the barsteward outta my bed.
so a good nights kip followed
When I finally woke, imagine my disgust to find that my room had been repainted and theyve moved my locker around.
Oh and then the shame and realisation set in
I woz in the right bed, right room, right floor but two blocks from mine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
no wunder he put up such a fight
Oh well that woz in 1968 or woz it 1969, time just flies, dont it.
I'll never ferget but fergin hell, wot a c*ck up
Mind you, best christmas I had EVER
rgds
mort (tryin to find his own bed)
and this is very true

[antonye]

Not mine, but I was there and felt bad...

I worked at the local pub/club/hotel on breaks from college either working behind the bar or DJing. Over the xmas period things got really busy as they'd have lots of xmas meals in there and people on company dos, getting especially rowdy when it was a free bar.

As part of the xmas layout, each sitting would get the usual cracker, party popper and the like, but we also used to have "snow balls". These were little balls, about the size of a golf ball, made out of cotton wool but with a slightly harder coating so you could throw them around. Basically this saved the punters throwing roasties and sprouts around!

Most parties ended at 1 or 2 am and then there would be the massive clean-up operation to get the function room cleared down. This place is massive - seats upto 450 and could hold 750 when used as the nightclub part - so it used to take forever to clear tables, get the glasses through the washer and move the tables out of the way so the cleaners could come along and do the rest. This obviously took some time as well.

However, to make this job a bit more interesting, we used to take the ice buckets, which by this point would just be full of water, and put a load of the cotton-wool snow balls into. You'd then retreat to a safe distance, usually behind a table or some chairs, and let fly a volley of wet snow balls at another worker. We all used to have a great laugh and sometimes things got a bit heated as getting smacked in the head with one of these was quite painful. Even the (young) manager of the place, who was also the owner's son, used to join in.

Anyway, early one morning after a particularly late night, we were still clearing up and started throwing them around. One of the other guys, Glenn, was standing at one end of the function room and the manager, Mark, was at the other end about 100 ft away. Glenn threw a really sweet little shot right at Mark, who ducked just in time before it hit his head. The only problem was that having missed him, it then smacked right into the middle of one of the emergency fire alarm switches, breaking the glass and setting off the alarm.

We had some very ****ed off hotel guests, who had been in bed for all of an hour, queueing up in the car park outside in the freezing cold for 30 minutes until the fire brigade would let us all back in.

Fortunately the boss was a good bloke and we all had a laugh about it!

Then there was the time, at the same place, the police turned up because we'd been watching some late-night porn on the big-screen tv in the bar while clearing away, and someone had spotted it from outside and rang the police...

Or the time the control panel in the dj box went haywire, turning all the disco lights on at once...

Or when one of the mesh covers from a speaker suspended from the ceiling came off and fell on a clubber, hitting him smack in the head. But I knew the guy and didn't like him, so that was ok...

So many stories about that place...