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Ruben to ride the GP4?
Spaniard set to downgrade to factory machine

The super donkey chucking Spaniard Ruben Xaus may see his dreams of being the 'Rookie of Year' go up in smoke should the rumours from the factory Bolognaise team be true. Word on the street is that Randy Mamola was born a female but more importantly to Ruben is the continuing speculation that he may be downgraded to this year's Ducati 2004 machine for the remainder of the season.

Ducati Corse have made no secret of the fact that they're getting rather embarrassed by the Spaniard's continuing success on the one year old satellite machine - regularly outpacing the full factory riders Loris Capirossi and Troy Bayliss.


Backwards logic. Ruben's rising up to the bottom.

"We're thinking of sticking Ruben on factory machine" said a sulking Ducati employee as he frantically searched the jobs page "He may think he's a big shot now but wait 'till he gets his donkey-stained hands on the GP4 nail, that will slow him down a bit. Suddenly he'll be qualifying next to Colin Edwards which would wipe the smile off anyone's face."
When asked if they intend on giving Neil Hodgson a GP4 the answer was fairly straightforward. "Nar. Although we've just ordered him a copy of 'A dummy's guide to qualifying' from Amazon.com, should be with us in 48 hours."

Although it's been doing the rounds for the past few weeks now the rumours that Xaus will move have really escalated in the last few days when a leaked transaction document showed that the factory team have ordered just short of four thousand extra fairings for the GP4 machine.
But for Ruben it's not all bad news as many of his doubters have been forced to sit up and take notice of his admirable results so far. Even the miserable, self-praising ******* King Frog was impressed by his performances this year. "Ruben has done good, despite an obvious lack of corner speed" said the boz-eyed amphibious pillock "If he continues in this way he may yet find a prestigious ride in World Superbikes."