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| #41  25-Feb-2004, 21:12 | |||
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| Drive-thru ATM -------------------------------PRESS RELEASE--------------------------------- Halifax Building Society is very pleased to announce that they are installing new "Drive Thru" Cash Dispensers. To enable customers to gain maximum benefit from this new facility they have conducted intensive behavioural studies to come up with the appropriate procedures for their use. AS FOLLOWS: Procedures for MALE customers 1. Drive up to the cash machine 2. Wind down your car window 3. Insert your card into machine and enter PIN 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw 5. Retrieve card, cash, and receipt 6. Wind up window 7. Drive off Procedures for FEMALE customers 1. Drive up to the cash machine 2. Reverse the required distance to align car window with cash machine 3. Re-start the stalled engine 4. Wind down the window 5. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to find card 6. Turn the radio down 7. Attempt to insert card into machine 8. Open car door to allow easier access to cash machine due to its excessive distance from the car 9. Insert card 10. Re-insert card the right way up 11. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN number written on the inside back page 12. Enter PIN 13. Press "cancel", and re-enter correct PIN 14. Enter amount of cash required 15. Check make-up in rear view mirror 16. Retrieve cash and receipt 17. Empty handbag again, to locate purse and place cash inside 18. Place receipt in back of chequebook 19. Re-check make-up 20. Drive forward 2 metres 21. Reverse back to cash machine 22. Retrieve card 23. Re-empty handbag, locate card holder, and place card into slot provided 24. Restart stalled engine and pull off 25. Drive for 2 to 3 miles 26. Release handbrake.   |
| #45 26-Feb-2004, 17:02 | ||||
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| Oh! Yeah...Doh!... Yeah but I thought one of you would have entered me... Oh! God what am I typing...You know what I mean!...Oh, Now I'm digging an even bigger hole...Oh No! That is not what I meant... NEVER MIND!  |
| #46 26-Feb-2004, 19:10 | ||||
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| Quote:
Gentleman.....................please form an orderly queue   |
| #48 26-Feb-2004, 19:55 | |||
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| You aint that ladee wot woz on radio five live tonite, KB woz you, under a psuedonym??? oh hell, usin a false name thingy Woz sellin 'er v.......y (prob on e-bay) to highest bidder Mind you she said she woz 18, but you say that all the time £8,400 woz the highest bidder, and NOOOO it woznt me, as I bid £8.40  a very confused and sober mort |
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