Essex girl jokes >"How> many children?" asks the council worker. >"10" replies the Essex girl >"10?" says the council worker. "What are their names?" >"Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne and Wayne" >"Doesn't that get confusing?" >"Naah..." says the Essex girl "its great because if they are out playing in the street I just have to shout WAAYNE, YER DINNER'S READY, or WAAYNE GO TO BED NOW and they all do it..." >"What if you want to speak to one individually?" says the perturbed council worker. >"That's easy," says the Essex girl... "I just use their surnames" > > >An Essex girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. >"Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. >"No" she replies. "This time it's mayonnaise." > >Essex Girl enters a sex shop & asks for a vibrator. >The man says "Choose from our range on the wall." >She says "I'll take the red one." >The man replies "That's a fire extinguisher." > >An Essex girl is involved in a nasty car crash and is trapped and bleeding. >The paramedics soon arrive on site. >Medic: "It's OK I'm a paramedic and I'm going to ask you some questions?" >Girl: "OK" >Medic: "What's your name?" >Girl: "Sharon." >Medic: "OK Sharon, is this your car?" >Sharon: "Yes." >Medic: "Where are you bleeding from?" >Sharon: "Romford, mate." |