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 12-Sep-2003, 19:01 | #1 |
| Registered Forum User 500SD  Posts: 640 Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Caterham, Surrey Mood: Christ been away too long.... Insurance claim quotes... True extracts from UK Insurance Claim forms; These were collected by Norwich Union for their annual Christmas magazine. "I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought." ----- "I pulled into a lay-by with smoke coming from under the bonnet. I realized the car was on fire so took my dog and smothered it with a blanket." ----- Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident? A: Traveled by bus? ----- This Norwich Union customer collided with a cow. The questions and answers on the claim form were: Q - What warning was given by you? A - Horn Q - What warning was given by the other party? A - Moo ----- "I started to turn and it was at this point I noticed a camel and an elephant tethered at the verge. This distraction caused me to lose concentration and hit a bollard." ----- "On approach to the traffic lights the car in front suddenly broke." ----- "I was going at about 70 or 80 mph when my girlfriend on the pillion reached over and grabbed my testicles so I lost control." ----- "I didn't think the speed limit applied after midnight" ----- "I knew the dog was possessive about the car but I would not have asked her to drive it if I had thought there was any risk." ----- Q: Do you engage in motorcycling, hunting or any other pastimes of a hazardous nature? A: I Watch the Lottery Show and listen to Terry Wogan. ----- "First car stopped suddenly, second car hit first car and a haggis ran into the rear of second car." ----- "Windscreen broken. Cause unknown. Probably Voodoo." ----- "The car in front hit the pedestrian but he got up so I hit him again" ----- "I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment." ----- "The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention." ----- "I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way" ----- "A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face" ----- "A pedestrian hit me and went under my car" ----- "In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole." ----- "I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision and I did not seethe other car." ----- "I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident." ----- "To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front I struck the pedestrian." ----- "My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle." ----- "An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished." ----- "I was thrown from the car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows."  | |
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