Ducati Sporting Club UK > General > Idle Chat > Another Friday chuckle

[clockwork orange]

> In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals,
> but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a
male animal is punishable by death.
>
> (Like THAT makes sense.)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's
genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during
the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
>
> (Do they look different reversed?)
> *~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse.
> This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the
deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all
times.
>
> (A brick??)
> *~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> The penalty for ************ in Indonesia is decapitation.
>
> (Much worse than "going blind!")
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the
> countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the
privilege of having sex for the first time . . Reason: under
Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.
>
> (Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else
> in the world that even comes close to this?)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her
> adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands.
The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in
any manner desired.
>
> (Ah! Justice!)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England - but only
> in tropical fish stores.
>
> (But, of course!)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband,
> and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the
room to witness the act.
>
> (Makes one shudder at the thought.)
> *~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*~*
>
> In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex
> with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
>
> (I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass
> this law?)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending
> machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed
from a vending machine only in places where alcoholic beverages
are sold for consumption on the premises."
>
> (Is this a great country or what? Well . . not as great as
> Guam!)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
>
> (Who volunteers for this stuff?)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for
> pleasure.
>
> (Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times
> its own weight and always falls over on its right side when
intoxicated.
>
> (From drinking little bottles of ?)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> Butterflies taste with their feet.
>
> (Ah, geez.)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
>
> An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
>
> (I know some people like that.)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> Starfish don't have brains.
>
> (I know some people like that, too.)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
>
> And, the best for last Turtles can breathe through their
> butts.
>
> (And you think that I have bad breath!)
> *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*