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Ducati Plans to Increase Production as Carlos Checa Joins Team

Claudio Domenicali, CEO of Ducati Corse, announced that the parent company will increase motorcycle production in preparation for the arrival of MotoGP rider Carlos Checa to the Ducati MotoGP team.

"Carlos is a very talented rider with a very passionate style. Unfortunately, he has a habit of crashing as a result and this has a tendency to consume motorcycles. We feel we simply must make more motorcycles to stay ahead of his testing and racing season in the coming year."

"In addition, we have made some modifications to his motorcycle in anticipation of his aggressive style. Some of the vents that would normally appear on the Desmosedici F/05 will be closed on his particular bike. Hopefully this will reduce the retention of gravel that inevitably happens to Carlos' equipment. Also, a map of each particular track will be placed on the tank of his motorcycle. We feel this will increase the time Carlos spends on the pavement and reduce the time he spends parked next to a hay bale."

For the past few years when Checa did manage to finish a race, it was mostly middle of the pack on his Yamaha MotoGP bike. Often, his bike was found to be several pounds heavier than it was when it started the race due to the addition of pea gravel, native soil, grass, and even other rider's visor tear-offs. This was in spite of the reduction in fuel weight. Domenicali played down the idea that this would hamper the efforts of Ducati Corse.

"Even if it does, we will deal with it as we deal with all of racing's challenges. This is no more serious than the others we have faced." When asked about the costs of the increased production and modifications to the motorcycle itself, he replied confidently,"When we race, we gather information no matter where we finish. This information helps us built faster and safer bikes not only to race, but to sell to our customers. They expect to receive the best product we are able to build and one that is excellent in all venues and situations.

Unfortunately, crashing is often a part of motorcycle riding and racing. The information we will receive from Carlos' bike will help us build a beautiful and competitive motorcycle whether it is parked in a garage, screaming down a straightaway, or being stuffed into a tire-barrier.

Hopefully, our customers will realize how sturdy our bikes are as they survive these off-track excursions. And who knows, perhaps motorcycles will be subjected to the same kinds of crash-testing that automobiles are now required to perform. If and when that happens, we will be ready!"

It is well-known that Checa brings with him substantial sponsorship money. However, few people outside MotoGP realize that the source is is not limited to cigarette companies. Banks have long viewed Carlos Checa as a perfect promoter for their business. An unnamed spokesman for a major banking concern cited Checa in particular as a model of the type of rider they wanted to have carrying their banner. "People see him sliding across the grass at a hundred miles an hour and think,"Hey, here's a guy a little down on his luck". Then they see our bank's name prominently displayed on a shard of fiberglass as it becomes disjointed from his motorcycle and it becomes apparent that we are behind him, catching his fall." In fact, his image is about to be used by a European check-cashing service as part of their "Bounced Checa" marketing campaign. A "Checa C(r)ashing Service" idea was recently rejected as too obscure after he finished several races in a row.

In related news, stock in Yamaha Corporation, Checa's former employer, has risen since Checa's departure was announced. Company spokesmen cited decreased costs associated with equipment replacement and a reduction in health insurance premiums as the reason.