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  #11  
Old 22-Apr-2005, 12:08
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Steve M Steve M is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by Lily
Quote:
Originally posted by Ducnow


>Secrets to a Happy Marriage

>1. It is important to find a woman that cooks and cleans.
>
>2. It is important to find a woman that makes good money.
>
>3. It is important to find a woman that likes to have s*x.
>
>MOST important....
>
>4. These three women must NEVER meet


When i was reading this one i was like... "yeah, but that's impossible. It's too perfect", but then i got to number 4.

Hey that's not true... i fit all these categories.... in my own little way!!

been laughing out loud here



No wonder JPM doesn't get too worked up about his his bike problems!!!!
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  #12  
Old 22-Apr-2005, 12:16
MarkyMark76 MarkyMark76 is offline
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Mille
 
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I finally found that virtual bar you lot talk about. It rocks!!!

http://origin-www.virtualbartender.beer.com/VB2/
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  #13  
Old 22-Apr-2005, 12:41
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JPM JPM is offline
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Mood: Soon my pet, soon
Another joke...

3 guys go out on the pop and get royally hammered, the next day all hung over they meet up to recollect upon the previous evenings events.

First guy says he got home and blew chunks all night long

Second guy says that's nothing, I got home smashed the front door down, wrecked the house, hit the wife and looks like I'm getting divorced

Third guy now kicks up, hang on guys, I foolishly drove home, killed 3 people and abandoned the car and reported it stolen, been up all night worried sick..

The room goes quiet until the first guy says, guys look you don't understand..... chunks is my dog !!!
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  #14  
Old 22-Apr-2005, 14:16
guest1 guest1 is offline
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A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods.
She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The
frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you
three wishes." The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you,
but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten." The woman
said, "That's okay." and for her first wish, she wanted to be the most
beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that
this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the
world, an Adonis whom women will flock to. " The woman replied, "That's
okay, because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will have eyes
only for me." So, KAZAM! she's the most beautiful woman in the world.
For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world.
The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the
world and he will be ten times richer than you. " The woman said,
"That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine." So,
KAZAM! she's the richest woman in the world. The frog then inquired
about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like a mild heart attack."



Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them.



Attention female readers: This is the end of the Joke for you. Stop
here and continue feeling good.



Attention Male readers: Please scroll down.































The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife. Moral of the
story: Women are really dumb when they think they're really smart. Let
them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show


PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this, it only goes to show
that women never listen!
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  #15  
Old 22-Apr-2005, 15:02
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Screwy Screwy is offline
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ROFL
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  #16  
Old 22-Apr-2005, 16:04
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BDG BDG is offline
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Mood: Daft as MartinH after too much Smirnoff Ice
guest1 that was class.

[Edited on 22-4-2005 by BDG]
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