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Old 26-Apr-2006, 16:23   #1
CK CK is offline
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Aint it great to be British?
CLASSIC VERSION:

An ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.

THE END





THE BR!ITISH VERSION:
An ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like him, are cold and starving.

The BBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper, with cuts to a video of the ant in his comfortable warm home in Hampstead with a table laden with food.

The British are stunned that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so while others have plenty.

The Liberal Party, the Respect Party, the Transvestites with Starving Babies Party and the Coalition against Poverty demonstrate in front of the ant's house. The BBC, interrupting a Rastafarian cultural festival special from Grimsby with breaking news, broadcasts them singing "We Shall Overcome."

Ken Livingstone laments in an interview with Panorama that the ant has got rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share."

In response, the Labour Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti-Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer.

The ant's taxes are reassessed, and he is also fined for failing to hire grasshoppers as helpers. Without enough money to pay the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by Camden Council.

The ant moves to France, and starts a successful agribiz company [funded by the Britain via the EU.

The BBC later shows the now fat grasshopper finishing up the last of the ant's food, though
Spring is still months away, while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he hasn't bothered to maintain it.

Inadequate government funding is blamed; Diane Abbot is appointed to head a commission of enquiry that will cost £10m.

The grasshopper is soon dead of a drug overdose; the Guardian blames it on the obvious failure of government to address the root causes of despair arising from social inequity.

The abandoned house is taken over by a gang of immigrant spiders, praised by the government for enriching Britain's multicultural diversity, who promptly set up a marijuana growing operations and terrorise the community.

THE END
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Old 26-Apr-2006, 17:45   #2
Nick D. Nick D. is offline
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I think that story is easily translated to work in whatever country you reside. We have those same issues in the US.
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Old 26-Apr-2006, 19:29   #3
philthy philthy is offline
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Most reasonably intelligent adults realise that not everyone in this world receives the education, opportunities or loving family that they are entitled to and therefore are disadvantaged from the offset of childhood. What chance do we think a kid in an inner city sink estate has, surrounded as they are by neglect and destruction of their environment and education by those in power.

Kids who leave school unable to read or write and in many cases unable to make value judgements on what is right or wrong and the ramifications which can follow from inappropriate decisions and behaviour, mainly due to a weak and spineless government and educational system.

Some groups of people will still get together and try to make a difference and stand up for equal rights for all, be they lesbian ,gay, black, immigrants or the uneducated or people lacking simple opportunities to improve their lives.

Yes they do need help and funding and we who are able to should support them, after all we are one of the richest economies in the world.

Instead of criticising the criminal and disadvantaged in our communities we should take time out to reflect on the opportunities which we have been given and think about what we as citizens can do for our fellow human beings to improve society as a whole.

Save your criticism for a free loading prime minister who has taken us into an illegal war costing the lives of tens of thousands of innocent people. Probably more than the previous dictator managed in his lifetime. And what an example our current home secretary is setting to others at the moment. '' I've set 1000 dangerous prisoners out into society who should have been deported and I will not resign no matter what crimes have been commited by them since''

Have we yet heard the word ''Sorry''?

What an example to set to the people he is supposed to protect.

Phil
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Old 26-Apr-2006, 21:20   #4
Martini Martini is offline
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Hmm. I think we were meant to read the Ant Story with a certain amount of tongue-in-cheek.

There is a certain ring of truth in it though.

Eg: I was brought up in a run-down area of North London. I hated it and worked my ar*se off, did my homework and got an apprenticeship. My school mates thought I was nuts working for such low pay and having to go to night school.

I’m now director of a company and, whilst not rich, I have no money worries, but I’m up every night worrying about my business and my staff.

I have a brother. He was brought up in the same house, same parents and at the same school.

He’s currently in prison for theft.
He’s a drug addict.
He doesn’t work and has always been on the dole.
He has a nice flat (provided by the council).
He has a car but never has tax, insurance or MOT’s.

I work 50-60 hours a week, my brother thinks I’m an idiot working at all.

If I need help from the authorities they won’t give it until my savings are used up and I’ve sold my house. If my brother needs anything he asks and “The Social” gives it to him.

Who’s the ant and who’s the grasshopper?
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Old 26-Apr-2006, 21:45   #5
raykay748R raykay748R is offline
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My own situation also reflects Martini's.
If any one else would like to ease their own guilty conscience, caused by life's 'unfairness' they are welcome to come and pay my f$*king taxes, I know that I'm keeping a family afloat on what I pay each month.
And as for the Iraq scenario, when were you last there, me Op Telic and Op Telic 4. 12 months of my life for these innocents, 24 months of my life for Kosovo and Bosnia and 12 months for the NI solution + other minor holidays abroad. I can tell you all about supposedly being innocent.
Ck's text was meant to be a light hearted reflection on an all too familiar story that seems to be affecting everyday people's lives. If none of what is written has ever affected you, then you are truly in an envious position.
I know that I and many other 'civil servants' are sick of this country, it's 'leaders' and the direction they are taking us in.
PS ref the 'poor' children that can't read or write, my partner is a teacher and has been for 10 years in this country and abroad, take a visit to a local comprehensive and see for yourself what is happening in our schools, before commenting.
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Old 26-Apr-2006, 21:46   #6
CK CK is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by raykay748R

Ck's text was meant to be a light hearted reflection on an all too familiar story that seems to be affecting everyday people's lives.

it was indeed
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Old 26-Apr-2006, 21:49   #7
raykay748R raykay748R is offline
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I'll stick up for you girl!
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Old 26-Apr-2006, 22:13   #8
sharpo sharpo is offline
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It would be great to be British if we could freely express our concerns for our nation without being accused of racism.

I don't agree with a lot that the BNP stand against but they do have some good national values.

Might be the wrong place to mention it but then again it might not.
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Old 27-Apr-2006, 08:58   #9
whyworry whyworry is offline
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Quote:
Originally posted by philthy
Most reasonably intelligent adults realise that not everyone in this world receives the education, opportunities or loving family that they are entitled to and therefore are disadvantaged from the offset of childhood. What chance do we think a kid in an inner city sink estate has, surrounded as they are by neglect and destruction of their environment and education by those in power.

Kids who leave school unable to read or write and in many cases unable to make value judgements on what is right or wrong and the ramifications which can follow from



























inappropriate decisions and behaviour, mainly due to a weak and spineless government and educational system.

Some groups of people will still get together and try to make a difference and stand up for equal rights for all, be they lesbian ,gay, black, immigrants or the uneducated or people lacking simple opportunities to improve their lives.

Yes they do need help and funding and we who are able to should support them, after all we are one of the richest economies in the world.

Instead of criticising the criminal and disadvantaged in our communities we should take time out to reflect on the opportunities which we have been given and think about what we as citizens can do for our fellow human beings to improve society as a whole.

Save your criticism for a free loading prime minister who has taken us into an illegal war costing the lives of tens of thousands of innocent people. Probably more than the previous dictator managed in his lifetime. And what an example our current home secretary is setting to others at the moment. '' I've set 1000 dangerous prisoners out into society who should have been deported and I will not resign no matter what crimes have been commited by them since''

Have we yet heard the word ''Sorry''?

What an example to set to the people he is supposed to protect.

Phil




wow philthy for prime minister i say!!



I BLAME ALL THE PEOPLE WHO VOTE FOR THEM!!!!!

DONT VOTE !!!


ATALL ---EVER!!!
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Old 27-Apr-2006, 12:36   #10
guest1 guest1 is offline
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Good funny parable CK,
I enjoyed for one


WRT the rest of the thread, there's a time and a place.
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