I'd go the CBT direct access route which is what I did.
DO NOT under any circumstances allow hubby to watch or try to teach you.:P
I don't think that it matters whether it's a woman or male instructor as long as you are comfortable with them.
My instructor was an ex Para...and once he'd got your personality he then either taunted you into passing or nurtured you into it...I had the former, I dropped it on a U turn and he told me i'd lost my bottle and walked off leaving me to pick it up! I was so angry but he knew that I was not about to let it beat me!!! He was ACE. The girl I took my test with needed lot's of TLC which he gave her, explaining in detail about EVERYTHING (much to my impatient annoyance)Still go and have a cup of tea with him some Sunday's if I'm about!
I did my CBT, had a Cagiva Mito delivered 3 weeks later, and did my direct access about 6 weeks after that. I'd never been on the back of a bike, let alone rode a pushbike confidently! I've never looked back!
I can agree with what Ruth and Jen say. It's not about confidence tho'...I'd just say it's about practice...listening to people, not taking advice but storing info, and riding as often as you can.
Please dont go the scooter route...That's what people expect from women...If you want it to pootle round town then that's fine, but dont just go for scooter because you dont think you "ought" to!
GO FOR IT!