The husband emerged from the bathroom naked and was climbing into bed, when his wife complained, as usual, "I have a headache".
"Perfect," her husband said. " I was just in the bathroom powdering my d*ck with aspirin. You can take it orally or as a suppository, it's up to you!!!
Funeral being held for woman who has just passed away. On the way out of the church the pallbearer stumbles and the coffin bumps into a wall, whereupon there is a muffled moan from within the coffin. They open the coffin and find she is alive. She gets out and it turns out that she lives for another 10 years then passes away. On the way out of the church the second time the husband shouts "Watch out for that wall"