| Another true story...
I was about 18, in the first flush of lust with a new girlfriend and we'd ended up in bed. Back then we didn't have to worry about Aids, but since she wasn't on the pill, and I had come unprepared, I had to get dressed, get on my Ossa 250 and scoot off for some condoms - wait there...don't move...I'll be back.
It was in the days before supermarkets and garages stocked them, so I had to go to the nearest chemist. I picked some durex up, joined the queue to pay.
As I reached the front of the queue there was a woman behind me examining a pair of sunglasses that she'd picked off a rack. I handed my packet of condoms over to the 20 something shop assistant, and as I did so she looked straight at me, but spoke over my shoulder to the woman behind me with the sunglasses "Would you like to try them on, we've got a mirror here", she said. I knew who she was speaking to, but with the brashness of youth I said "No thanks, I'm sure they'll fit but if you want to make sure, I'm sure we can arrange something".
By now, sunglasses woman was in a fit of hysterical giggles. It was as though the assistant had seen me for the first time. She looked at me, then slowly down to the packet in her hand and went a bright shade of crimson...
I don't know quite how I made it out of the door if splitting my sides laughing hadn't killed me the dagger look from the girl should have  | 
Jools
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